Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Broken Hearted

Oh friends, what a crazy few weeks its been.  We have been busy with our Fit Family Challenge (mostly walking) and back to school...but the thing that has been keeping me from you is my fur baby boy.  My sweet kitty boo boo is still AWOL.  The neighbor came over last night and thinks that he may have crawled under her porch to pass.  My hubby said that cats will do that, and I am just beside myself about it.  Complete denial.  I keep saying that I am sure it's going to be a raccoon when we check.  My heart is broken.  I have had pets growing up, well not...I have had dogs.  I have never been a cat owner.  I was actually allergic growing up, so when my oldest asked for a cat 7 years ago we went to the shelter and she looked and I sniffed.  The deal was it had to be a cat she liked and that didn't make my eyes swell shut.  That is when we found Nelson.
Nelson was one of a litter of kitties left in a box at the door step of the shelter.  After the vet saw him, it was determined that he had been abused and had some structural damage to his face.  He was a wheezer.  He sounded so sad and like an asthmatic old man, but he seemed happy to be going home with us.  When it came time to name him I suggested Nelson.  for some reason he made me think of Major Nelson from I Dream of Jeanie.  I fed him, changed his litter box...but I was steadfast in my statements that he was NOT my cat.  He was my daughter's.

Nelson let us pick him up and carry him around like a tiny baby.  He loves snuggling and we developed quite the routine.  I wake up in some random cramped position everyday, because I seem to contort myself around him when he gets in bed and snuggles around my knees.  Every morning, I get out of the shower, he meows like a maniac at the bathroom door and I rush to let him in before he wakes up the entire house.   Then I scurry around while he tried to rub himself against my still wet legs.  I rub his belly and then move on to getting ready.  Once realizing the belly rub is done the meowing starts back up and I toss a pony tail holder to him to keep him busy while I finish getting ready.

We go downstairs and have breakfast.   This involves me trying to get myself food and him meowing like a madman again for milk.  We eat, say good morning to the other kitty and the pup, and when I go to leave he follows me outside and scurries off to kill things. 

He has his little wheeze, and sneezes like a pro which is least humans can cover their mouths when things fly out, and he is small due to also having other health issues.  When I was preggers he would lay on my belly, well, until mini me kicked him through there one time...then it was game off.  At about 7-8 months preggers, he crawled into the ceiling of the basement and I panicked to the point of uncontrollable sobs.  This would have been OK except hubby came home from the gym to me in this state worried something had happened with the baby.  I just kept saying, she will never forgive me if we lose her kitty (about DD).

I have walked the street at midnight when he goes out carousing, stood in rain storms urging him out of his hiding place under the car to come inside to safety, woken up on the couch with him curled up so tightly with me that I yell at him for being a pain.  And now here I sit, tears streaming down my face while I type this because I miss him so damn much.  I can't explain how very much I want it to be a raccoon or some other random creature under the neighbors porch.  I want to believe that he is on an epic adventure and will return soon...but at the same time, I need to know and if so have that closure.  I have screamed about how selfish it would be to go off and die somewhere, and sworn off any other cats after his brother is gone because I don't know how else to cope with this.    I had two amazing dogs as a child and when it was time, we were together as a family with the vet when it was time to put them down.  I was able to tell them how much I loved them and say goodbye.  I haven't said good bye to Nelson yet.

My husband keeps telling me what a great life he had, and I know its true.  No one else would have taken this wheezy, sickly little kitty from the shelter.  He is loved beyond measure, and I can only hope that he knows how very much I love him (especially because I told him the opposite so many times when he would make me too crazy). 

Say a prayer for me as I go home today and do the hardest thing I have done in awhile, and look under that porch.

Friday, August 7, 2015

Fit Family Challenge Days 6-9

I am not going to lie.  I have had moments in these past few days where any one of the above excuses could have worked.  I am PROUD to say that I have been pushing through.  The whole family has been.  It's actually been kind of inspirational.  It helped that the girls already had pre-planned activities, but they have been god about making sure the hubs and I made time for ourselves too.

So, since last we met, this is what I have been up to:
Day 6: walking
Day 7: swimming and walking (mini me crushed 2.25 miles with me on our walk)
Day 8: rest
Day 9: walk

Now I know what you might be, hello, did you see Day 8?  Yes, I did.  i lived it.  But after an hour of lap swimming and a 2.25 mile walk, I was starting ton get some pain back in  my hip and didn't want to totally derail my ART therapy from the day before too so I opted to rest...just aiming for my step goal.

This has been a pretty great week.  I have been monitoring the food much more closely and making time for myself, as well as fit time for the family.  I think it may be starting to stick for the kids too.  They are learning that just because they have soccer everyday or dance they can still do other activity as well.  I mean, on day 7...we all swam together as a family for an hour, taking turns doing laps and swimming around with mini.  And THEN we all had other activities after that as well.    It was not so long ago that the kids would comeback at us with something like "But I had gym today" or "I should really save my energy for practice."  Even THEY are cutting back on the excuses as they see the benefits they are getting.

My down almost 15 pounds and looks stronger then I ever remember.  We are taking advantage of this weekends Tax-free holiday here in Ohio to buy her all new jeans for school.  I was so proud when she stated that she needed a size bigger in her skinny jeans to fit over her "muscular thighs."  And mini me...she is crushing things in acro that two months ago she didn't' have the strength to do, the swimming is really making a difference in our arm strength.

So today starts day 10, just over a month to go before vacation and the hubs and I have a swim date planned for tonight while the girls are at dance/soccer.  If it's just the two of us we can just focus on doing laps and building our strength and lung capacity.  I mean, whew, I have an all new respect for swimmers.  It's hard.

What are your plans for the weekend?

Monday, August 3, 2015

Fit Family Challenge and a new twist

I found this picture online courtesy of Poppy over at Facing40 and thought, how perfect that this shows up on my radar right now.  Ultimately, this is my goal.. I have two daughters, one that is a full fledged teen going into high school in a few short weeks and one that truly is my little sponge.  Dad and I can say LOTS of things, but a s a woman, I am the person their sweet and crazy little estrogen filled minds will look to first.  This is why I try and keep myself accountable.  I want to be healthy for me of feel good and be comfortable in the skin I'm in...but I also want to be a good example to my girls (that and the added bonus that the healthier I am, the longer I can make them crazy in these lives of ours) LOL.

I am VERY proud to say that we are five days into the Fit Family Challenge in our house and we are still going strong.  Even the pup has been getting more exercise as we have been taking her on our hikes and letting her swim in the river.  Here is a recap of what we have done so far:

Day 1: Swimming in the pool
Day 2: Swimming in the pool
Day 3: 2.75 mile bike ride (Mini me was feeling rough by the end of this one)
Day 4: Swimming in the pool
Day 5: Hike in the woods

Now some of these days had overlapping things...we hiked a few days actually, but yesterday that was our main exercise.  I feel like whatever is our main source of focus with exercise is what we will track.  It makes me feel pretty good seeing how well we are doing, and this is NOT counting that fact that I have been pretty good with my step goals too. 

I have been so proud of us that I forgot part of the other side of this coin, and that is where my new "twist" comes in.  As a woman getting closer each year to the big 4-0, I have seen this change in my metabolism.  It is not the rapid fire friend of my 20's, not even the still chugging along friend of my early 30's.  It has gotten slower, and to me it feels like it has gotten S--L--O--W--E--R.  This is hard when you have been pretty blessed in this arena for the better part of a 15 years.  My metabolism has always been there to keep my happy despite what I achieved in the exercise arena.  Well, no more I say.  This brings me to the new "twist" I am adding to my version of our fit family challenge.

I am generally pretty good about tracking my food on MFP.  But lately I have gotten into the habit of allowing the hard work I do with my workouts allow me more food.  Like if my goal is 1400 cals/day, and I burn 300 working out...I have gotten into the habit of allowing myself 1700 for the day.  And where this is OK, I know, it's not helping me remove those last few pounds I want to remove.  And when getting on the scale I also am taking into account that with the renewed dedication to working out I have to allow for some influx with muscle rebuild, I still need to be better about the choices I am making and the indulgences I am allowing. 

Today I start fresh with MFP and I am aiming to eat the allotted calories for me each day.  No more, no less (well not too many less...I need the fuel to workout out).  I am committed to doing this for a week and see how I feel and how successful I am.

If you have any great family fitness ideas, please share them!  I love swimming and getting some laps in, but I need a little variety as well.  And with soccer this week for the big kid and dance camp for the little, finding time to get to the pool will be tricky for me. 

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Family Challenge Day 2

Well day one of swimming was almost a bust.  My hubby works at the local university so Mini and I suited up to hit the pool.  Got over there, swiped my ID (dressed in my suit with mini in her water wings), and cross over to the big closed sign on the pool.  Um, what?!?  No mention of this on the website, nothing on the door, the girl at the desk didn't mention it as we water winged our way into the building.  But alas, there will be no swimming in the dark, empty pool.  not only is it closed, its closed for the next MONTH!  The tears start up as Mini is devastated by this news.  I walk back to Susie Oblivious at the desk and was like, "so, I guess no swimming."  She looks up from her magazine and responds, "oh, us that why she is wearing those.  yeah,. sorry.  Pool is closed.  There is a paper somewhere."  Then she shuffles through the stack of print outs on her counter until she finds something about the pool closure.  Great.  Tears still coming from Mini.

Think!  Ok, so I call the city rec to see if they have open swim now.  Hallelujah they do, so we get back in the car and drive to the city rec.  Once we arrive and walk in, Mini remembers our scout trip here.  The girls learned about healthy eating and fitness and got to do some exercises.  She seems happy to be here and asks why we don't come more.  Well, we don't have memberships anymore.  This answer seems SUPER lame though, especially now with our Family Challenge.  What to do?  Easy, renew!  So I renew the family membership and we are off to the pool.

The water actually feels glorious.  We have opted for the actual rec and not the outdoor pool too so we have the pool pretty much to ourselves.  Mini doesn't really know how to swim (yet) so this is a 2 fold victory.  We get some kick boards and set to it.  Before I now it, we have been floating and paddling around for an hour!  We still have to hit the grocery store though so I pull a very reluctant and unhappy girl out of the water with a promise to return the next day.

Now, I don't know of it was the swimming, the hike she took with dad and dog earlier...or just natural inclination but she loaded our cart with fresh fruit and veggies.  I LOVED it!

Today at work I get a text, "when will you be home?"  Someone wanted the family to swim together.  So i finish up my day and head home and this is what I am greeted with

In her suit ready to go back to the pool.  I have to say here in all honesty, the hubs was already in his suit too.  :)

I hurry upstairs to get my suit on to and we head off.  For day 2 since there were 2 grown ups in the pool, we were ab;e to take turns doing laps while the other played with Mini.  Another fine hour of swimming in for the day, and later this evening we are heading out on a family hike!  Look out world, here we come.

If it were up to Mini, we would be swimming everyday.  And while I do like love the full body, non-impact work outs we get in the pool...I need a little variety in my workouts.  We girls may try and squeeze in a short bike ride before the hike.  We are just on fire.  Hopefully we are going just as strong in 40 more days!

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Family Challenge Day 1

My hubby is still in recovery mode from his back surgery.  We had hoped that by the end of the 90 day window from the surgeon he would be back to 100%, that is not quite the case.  When he was in the worst part of his pain, he had lots of numbness from where his disc was pressing on the nerve that ran down his leg into his foot.  He had pain, numbness and at times had to walk with a cane.  For someone with a VERY physical job, this was hard...add in our two very active children and it was near impossible.

So now we are cleared by the doc, he can go back to doing everything he did before the surgery...but he still has this numbness from time to time and residual pain.  It's so hard for me to watch him be in pain and what to do?  Well, last night we were sitting in our family room after dinner and he looks at me and says, "Lets see how healthy we can be from now until vacation."  Now, we have had these little challenges before, but there is more at stake this time.  I know he is worried about begin able to walk around Disney for a few days with how he is currently feeling.  With that in mind, there was no need to pause, I knew this would be good.  "Ok, lets do it!"

So here we are on day one...we have 42 days until we leave and I think that maybe by doing SOMEthing everyday it will help build strength back up in his muscles that was lost during his pre-surgical time and hopefully (fingers and toes crossed) re-strengthening this will help with his pain. 

This little challenge is a two-fold one for me though.  I have decided to help get myself back in the habit of sitting here with YOU more to blog each day of the challenge as well.  What the what?!?!  Yep, I'm going to do my best to sit down at least for a few minutes everyday and keep you up-to-date on how we are doing as well as keep my self honest and accountable about how we are doing. 

How does that sound?  What I am most excited about with this one is our inclusion of the kiddos too!  It really is a full family challenge, and to me that makes it the best!  So, what do we have planned for day one?  Swimming. 

My big girl had a soccer showcase this past weekend on the other side of the state so we all packed up and headed down.  She stayed with her team in one hotel and Mom, dad and lil sis stayed elsewhere.  Sher is going to be a freshman and we were literally just down the way from her so if she needed anything we were right there...but we tried to give her the freedom of being with the coaches, team and team managers.  We know we have to loosen the strings some now that she is in high school.

Anywho...if you know me then you know that I generally don't swim.  It seems tat whenever we have access to a pool the water is always far colder than I would like, so I just don't do it.  Well...after 4 hours in the car and sitting through 3 hours of games in 90+ degree heat, I was game for he hotel pool.  It was magical.  The water felt perfect.  We got in and swam around for the better part of 45 minutes before getting dressed and going out to dinner (a nice anniversary steak dinner to top of the night for us and some delish looking ribs for Mini Me). 

The next morning Mini wanted to swim again...with how well behaved and patient she has been so far sitting and cheering on her big sis through the could we say no?!? My first thought too was, "well we were SO hot yesterday that is why the water felt so good, today I'm sire will be no dice."  Much to my surprise the water felt even BETTER the next morning.  So Mini Me hopped in while Dadoo hit the hot tub for a few...then we had a nice family swim, ending with Momma getting a few minutes in the hot tub.  This renewed my faith in swimming a bit.  Top that off with the hubs stating both the first night and next morning how good it felt on his leg to be in the pool and how that relief actually carried out into the day for him.  Swimming is going to be a BIG part of this challenge. 

So here we go, time to "dive in!"

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Here Comes the Sun

If you have been following me on my facebook page, then you know that July 2015 marks the completion of a goal that I have had for what seems like forever!  I FINALLY ran my first 5K! I mean it...I ran it.  The entire thing.  I am pretty proud of myself.  Now I know that many people (and I mean MANY people) have encouraged me, but can I say that the following words are not as encouraging as you may think...
"It's only 3 miles."

Yes, I know, I am well aware that the race I signed up for is only 3 miles, well 3.1 to be exact...but when someone hasn't trained, or is doubting themselves and feeling daunted already..hearing "It's ONLY 3 miles" does not help.  Thank you though to all those people who continuously told me that, I know that you were trying to be helpful...but dang.

So, I did the Smiles for Sophie Forever run with a group of friends.  SFSF is a foundation that is raising awareness for pediatric brain cancer.  Brain Cancer is a cause near and dear to our family as this past February we lost a dear friend, far too soon, to brain cancer.  A wonderful ray of light in this world that was extinguished far too soon.

This is a picture from our wedding of our dear friends Brandon and Tonya.  Look at that smile.  So young and full of life and hope for the future.  This picture is from seven years ago.  Before Tonya was first diagnosed.  My hubby and I were there when this sweet couple first started dating.  We celebrated their wedding day with them.

We were rocked to our cores when she was first diagnosed.  We celebrated her recovery and remission.  We celebrated the birth of their daughter just a year after our little mini me joined this world.

We hoped as she relapsed that God would find a way.  We feared and felt helpless as her condition worsened.  And we mourned with a dear friend, a "framily member" over the loss of his wife and mother to their sweet daughter.

Brandon and Tonya did, and he still continues to do, so much to raise awareness.  They did a lot with the organization Voices Against Brain Cancer, and due to her love of the music and meaning, they were always team Here Comes the Sun.

So when the facebook message came through asking if we would want to do this run with B, there was no hesitation.  I knew that I had to do it this time.  No excuses.  So with a few short weeks to train, I arrived the morning of July 4th ready to run.

I should pause here too and say that for some reason in my head I assumed that a race like this was going to be filled with hard core runners ready to go...I was shocked by how many people walked the race...or portions of it.  I'm not sure exactly why I was shocked, but it made me feel even better (for my own personal goals) that I ran the entire race.

The sun was shining on race day.  We were there, together, ready to go.  We were sporting our pinterest-inspired shirts, our nod to Here Comes the Sun, and as the race started I felt this  burst of energy.  I mean, come on, I was excited...I was finally doing this.  We started in the parking lot and ran down this LONG driveway into a development and as I rounded the first turn and felt the sun hit my face, my eyes filled with tears.  I could fee Tonya smiling down on us.  I knew that is what it was, she was smiling down on us and happy to see us all together, inspired by our love of her.  I remember thinking, in a perfect world she would be here with us...then it dawned on me...she already was.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Currently-June 2015

I have been reading Coffee Cake and Cardio for a few years now, and just LOVE it.  If you haven't checked out her site yer....WHAT IS STOPPING YOU?!?!?!  She has been doing a monthly series since early 2014 called "Currently" and I always enjoy reading her updates.  I have noticed other bloggers loving this idea too (most recently Carrots 'N' Cake, so I thought....why not give it a try?

Currently: June much good has come to our family this month.  I am settling in to my new job nicely (which as ah-may-zing BTW), hubby's back recovery is going well, then girls are killing it in their individual activities and I have rediscovered the gym. :)

Current Celebration: My little mini me was invited to audition for her dance studio's competition dance company.  She went in there, learned her routines, practiced her heart out and MADE IT!!  So proud of that little 5 year old ball of determination!
working it on picture day this past spring

ready to go at auditions

Current Confession: I have a TON of scrapbook stuff for my girls, and and TON of well intended ideas...but I am TERRIBLE about actually doing them.

Current Product Find: Ok, so this is really a "current" find as we discovered our love for it last year, but with the official start of summer coming up and its resurgence in our life over the past few current product find/love is Hawaiian Tropic Silk Hydration.  It's light, it smells nice and it makes my skin feel great!

Current Plan: Working out.  It should seem like a no-brainer right?  But it hasn't been.  This hip thing that I am STILL dealing with has made it rough, but I am getting there.  The hubs has been inspirational here.  He is killing it with his workouts and he is still only allowed to do "so much" since surgery.  But he is giving that "so much" 110%.

Current Book: I am without right now and it is awful!  PLEASE send some recommendations!!!!

Current Purchase: My first 5K registration!  If you have been reading my blog for a while then you know that I have been wanting to do this for a long, I mean LONG, time, but something always comes up...injury, time, excuse after excuse.  Well, I have officially registered for my first one.  A group of us will be running to honor the memory of a dear friend on July 4.  We are doing the Smiles for Sophie Forever run to benefit childhood brain cancer.

Current Drink: Lemon water.  I have always loved infused water, but it seems like recently the hubs has discovered the taste of lemon water and always has fresh sliced lemons now in the fridge. 

Current Holy Moly: My baby is done with kindergarten and my big girl is off to high school.  WOW!  I am still trying to process all that.

Current Show: I have been on a rather dark streak with my netflix binging...currently it is Dexter.  I read the first book and liked it, so decided to try out the series.

Current Want: Flipbelt.  I have an iPhone6+ which I LOVE but the idea of wearing that in an armband makes me nutty!  If anyone wants to buy me one as a congrats for signing up for my first 5K...let me know, I'll tell you wear to mail it. ;)

Current Obsession: Unplugged time with the fam!  It's hard with a teenager and an iPad savvy 5 year old, but we are managing it.  They are good about getting out and getting I'm ok with SOME time on devices (especially since the big one is doing summer reading on hers and the little one is practicing 1st grade website a lot...but there is also that time when it's brain rot TV or youtube).  So I am pushing for LOTS of fun family together time with NO and dad included. :)

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Settling In

It seems that life is finally starting to slow down a bit and allow itself to be enjoyed.  It has been so long since I sat down and wrote.  Lets see...since the post surgery hubby is doing SO well.  Like ah-may-zingly well.  He is taking his doctors advice to heart about getting out and moving to get himself back on track.  He has been walking a few miles a day or hitting the gym.  nothing overly strenuous...just the elliptical for right now as he hasn't been given 100% clearance yet...that comes in a few short weeks, but he is doing great!  I got him a fitbit for Fathers Day to keep him motivated...hoping it fits ok.  He has had a really hard time finding something that fits comfortably on his wrist.

Mini me is rocking out things too.  She has been asked to audition for her dance studio's Competition Team.  She is over the moon excited about this.  She has a clinic today to get ready and tomorrow is the big day.  Mommy is taking the morning of from work to get her all ready and be there tomorrow. We went and got a new leo to wear, have all our hair stuff ready.  Daddy even found a super cool dance bag to buy if she makes the team.  We have been talking about how much more time this would mean at the studio if she makes it, and she is excited.  I think she found her passion in dance and that makes my heart soar!  We have also talked about the importance of making good choices with this new adventure.  She has always been good with food choices...this one will ask for fruit or veggies  before sweets and chips and stuff 99% of the time.  We have been trying to pick fun activities that will keep us moving too and keep us both in better shape.  She is LOVING her bike right now, so we have been doing long walks with the dog and her on her bike...I even attempted to get back out jogging some but she is too hard of a coach.  She kept shouting that I needed to move faster...I was slowing her down. hahahahha

My big girl had her first night of high school soccer training last night.  Mini me and I dropped her off and then went and did a 1 mile walk.  They worked those girls hard.  They have to pass a fit test in order to even be considered for the team.   They have awhile series of stuff they have to do...sprints, kicks, burpees, juggling, sit ups, laps, etc all in under 27 minutes to be considered.  She started at 35, which wasn't terrible for her first time out, and that was with stopping to see what had to be done at each station.  It was a shock to her system I think, but in a good way.  She got in the car after and asked if we could start running together.  So proud of how she has stepped up to this challenge. 

My new job is awesome!  So family friendly and the schedule is unreal.  I heard someone down the hall the other day say he was "too blessed to be stressed."  I really feel like that is the best way to describe life right now!

Monday, April 20, 2015

Time keeps on marchhing

Wow...I can't believe I haven't taken the time to sit and write anything since February.  Shame on me,  right?!?!  It has been a crazy few months of ups and downs and emotions is all I can really say.

First and foremost, my hubby's  back.    We are (finally) successfully two weeks post-op  today.  The difference is amazing.  He was in pain for so  long, and it was heart breaking to watch.  The idea that no matter what  I did,  nothing could make him feel better.  This road was a long one, but amazingly brought us so much closer together.  I would never  wish what he went through on anyone, especially for the length of time that  he was suffering, but honestly...the new appreciation we both have for each other  is beyond  words.

I have always known that he was the driving force behind me, behind being better, stronger, more present in our relationship...but I didn't realize how much it affected me until the past few months.  In my exhaustion of running the kids everywhere...not an exaggeration, it reached the point where being in the car  too long,  or standing/sitting in certain places was unbearable for him so I became the primary chauffeur and errand  runner.   When physical  things needed done around the house, I was the one taking on the majority of the work.  When I would feel defeated or exhausted or at my wits end, I would get a text from him reminding me how much he loved me and how much he appreciated everything I was doing.

He pushed the kids to be more independent to allow time for me to take care of me too.  Squeeze in workouts,  help out with chores, anything and everything.  Now that he is on the mend, the  family mindset has been changed  for  the better.  My 5 year old asked me when we were going for a run the other day.  What?!?!  Amazing!  My thirteen year  old asked to go through and use my workout tapes.  What?!?!  Once we get the okay from the doc, the plan is to renew the whole family 's  membership plan for the rec center and get into a  habit of exercise everyday...for ALL OF US!  I love it!

I have had so many moments over the past few  months where I was so moved by something, or so worried that I thought, I should write about this...but  then when I would sit down to start...fear would take over  my heart.  My biggest  fear being what if something goes wrong.  As the supportive and loving spouse you focus on the positive.  You reassure your husband that things will be great, the light is at the end of the tunnel (not THAT light fear factor), we will take control of  our lives again!  But everywhere I turned there was bad.  Sat to watch Grey's  the week before and two healthy, strong police officer die end  of brain dead from throwing clots in surgery.  Not what I needed to hear right then, people asking a bout the surgery and the look  of fear when they found out how extensive it was going to be...great,  thanks peeps!

Our surgeon is amazing!  He was reassuring, calm and present, it made  me feel better just talking with him before hand.  The kiddos sat with me so patiently in the OR waiting room, along with my parents and my MIL.  Such good girls.  They have really been shining stars through  this  whole thing.

And today,  2 weeks post op, my honey is driving the girls to school.  He cleaned up the garage some yesterday, helped  do  yard work,   walked the Botanical Gardens.  We are  all working on building our endurance again, and we are  doing it as a team!  All  four of us actively  engaged.  We have had moments  like this, but  they have always been fleeting...I think we are finally all on the same page.  We are all focused on the right things.   My 5 year old even wants her own fitbit.  HA  I think we may invest in the kidfit...any thoughts or experiences out there with that.

Today, I am taking a deep breath and being thankful.  I  am thankful for my family,  my health and my blessings. How are you starting over  today?

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

My Fitspiration-an honest look in the mirror

I stumbled across this picture  the other day (as you  may have seen on my facebook page) and honest  to  goodness, my first thought was "I HAVE to blog  about this."  It has been a long time since I have felt that strongly about needing to get my thoughts out and I think this is all part of my overall "acceptance" of things.  I need top keep  moving forward and finding the things that I can own, that I can hold myself to, and these two ah-may-zing blogs I am fortunate to be a part  of,  both Waits and Measure(ments)s and The Journey, allow me to  do that.

I  have challenged myself this  year  to do right by ME.  I took the time (and bravery) to take physical measurements and put them out there to all of you.   Numbers in print that can't be taken back...well, I  mean I could delete the post but we all know once its in cyberspace it is  there forever.  I have been working through the pain in my hip, I have been trying to focus.  The past few months have been hard.   My who-knows-why-my -hip-hurts chronic pain, yep I said  chronic.  Did you know that if you suffer  from pain for  more than six weeks it's considered chronic?  I didn't until my doc told me. My poor husband with his back pain that turns out to be not one but TWO herniated discs and just keeps  plugging away as best  he can.  The winter blues, thee kids activities, life in general.  It's so easy to get bogged down, and that is not  good.  It (at  least for me) leads  to feeling blue  and that  leads to overeating which leads to guilt  which leads to more eating, which ultimately leads to your pants feeling just  THAT much to tight.  I know, I  have been living it.

I was feeling puffy and gross and shameful for allowing myself to get  this way.  How does someone who writes for  not  one but TWO health focused blogs spiral down like  this?  Could you feel my shame,  I mean, I fell off  the face of  the earth with my blogging.  I  wanted to disappear, but I didn't. My family inspired me, as they always seem to do.

When my hubby and I went to see  the kinesiologist  we found the reason for  my hip pain, at least  part of  it...bad foot.  Crazy I know,  but the doc gave me an orthotic insert and I felt relief for  the first time in a long time.  While there, both the hubs and I took a nutrition survey for toxicity.  WOW was I shocked.  I mean, I know that we  don't always eat what we  should, I know that I don't exercise as much as I should...but there is SO much more than that when figuring out why you feel the way you do.  The survey covered topics like: digestion, ears, emotions, energy, weight, head, name a few.  It asked about our risk exposure  ton  things like household chemicals, pesticides, and pets.  Once we finished, after picking my jaw up from the floor, I knew it was time to do something about it.

We took home the detox cleans the doc suggested  and read through what we needed to do and decided to get started.  This was  all before the herniated discs were actually diagnosed...just severe pain for  my poor hubby.  It got to  the point where he  knew after
no  relief came from the AK doc that he  needed to  see  someone how would help with the pain.  With that in mind,  we decided to put the cleans eon the back burner for a few (who wants to  cleanse pain meds out when you feel as   awful as  he does).

Fast forward  a few weeks and we are on the long wait to see  thew spinal surgeon, so meds are in place for a while.  Dear hubby encouraged me to  go ahead  and start  the cleanse, he can always do  later.  So I do...I can't even begin to tell you how much better I felt after just a few days.  The puffiness and bloating I'd been carrying in my midsection is gone.  My hubs even said my face looked less puffy and more sculpted like  it used to.  I  got  complimented at work by someone who said I looked as though I was"glowing".  All of this from detoxing?!?!  I mean, I wont get into the details but my little 5'2 frame was really holding onto a lot of stuff it shouldn't have been.

So as I am progressing, my hubby goes to see  a pain management doc.  The pain management doc is having him  wait on pain blockers until he tries some water therapy...ok, at least  we have something in place now.  I am feeling pretty good at this point but still not getting back on the workout trail.  Do you ever feel guilty for working out when someone else can't?  My  hubby has ALWAYS been my workout buddy.  He pushes me to keep going, keep getting stronger, and with him WANTING to work out and not being able to I felt as though I couldn't or at least shouldn't enjoy those endorphins without him.  And because he knows me so  well, he knew  I was stalling.

He told me that I was NOT to wait  for  him, that if he  was  able he'd be working out everyday, and I know he means it.  So I  hit the mat.  I am aiming high too for just really coming back.  I figure February is a short month so why not try to do SOMETHING everyday.  Whether its walking, a full on cardio or  strength long as  its something!  AND even better, PT has encouraged swimming for the hubs, its supposed to be a great way to  workout with herniated discs s o  he is re-upping the rec membership so he can start to swim and try and get himself back on track and stronger  and more fit wile still dealing with this pain.

Its funny because I have really only been out of my routine for about 6-8 weeks which in the grand scheme isn't a lot, but even with the setbacks I must have been doing something right.  My kiddos (well  the little one at least) actually will sit and watch and CHEER for me as I burn those calories,
and then they hit the mat together too.    They know the importance of it.

the girls  doing a little yoga together :)
So we are moving forward, and finding/making better choices and I feel like there  are  some GREAT things on the horizon for  my  little family!  Feeling fit-spired!